Livin the dream

Sometimes I go to the grocery store by myself and meet the volunteers back at the house and we pack lunches and go downtown. I have a plan when I go to the grocery store. I have a planned path that I follow every time I am in the grocery store, and the groceries go in the cart the same way. The lunches are packed the same way and handed out in the same way every week. Some people think I am a little...ahem...compulsive? For me it is all about efficiency. If I follow the same path in the grocery store, the groceries go in the cart and come off the cart so the person packing the groceries can pack them in such a way that they are easy to unpack at the house and easy to pack back in to lunches. I hold these plans loosely, and if I have people with me at the grocery store, I don't mind if the capri suns are stacked neatly in the front of the cart, and I don't mind if the snack packs aren't stacked neatly next to the capri suns, and I don't mind if the bread isn't stacked on the capri suns, or if the sliced meat is in the child seat, I do mind, however, if my volunteers purse is in the child seat, because come on, that just looks weird.

I make plans and hope that everything goes to plan. I also have hopes and dreams for free lunch. The purpose of free lunch is to meet the physical needs of people, and try to get to know them and be in community with them. I don't know anything about being homeless or being poor, so I don't assume that I know the life of a homeless person. I also don't assume that I know how to serve them. My dream is that someone would ask me to help them, that I would be invited in to their life, and I would have the opportunity to respond with whatever resources I am able to offer.

I have this notion that no one really wants to know the problems and junk of my life, so I often don't invite people in to the messy places in my life. Its easy to show someone the places in my life that are in order and comfortable to share, but it is a struggle, even with my good friends, to invite them in to the messes.

Alejandro is from Guatemala, his wife has breast cancer. We were serving lunch at the community center when Alejandro approached me telling his story in Spanish. I did my best to try to understand him, but I couldn't fully understand him. I asked Santos to help translate for me. Santos speaks English and Spanish, and he was happy to help me. How about that, now I am the one with needs, and the tables are turned. Freaking awesome. Santos translated for Alejandro, and Alejandro began to invite me in to a place in his life where he doesn't have it all together, and its a mess. I felt so privileged to hang out with him in his messy place.

I learned the lesson that we all have a deep need to share our whole lives with eachother. To know that we are not alone in our struggles and troubles is one of the most fulfilling feelings in the world. In my experience, most of us are walking around pretending that we have it all together, but the truth is that we are all fragile, and we don't know how to hold it all together. It is so much easier to make the best of things when we are known, and when others know what is going on. It doesn't matter if they can fix it, or have resources to provide help, but for some reason being known helps to hold it together. My belief is that when our burdens are known, they are a lighter load to carry.

So my hope is for more open doors, not only with the people I serve, but in my own life. I think we all have the ability to put on a facade of perfection, but we aren't perfect. It seems like a simple enough lesson, but it is hard to put in to practice. Baby steps. It doesn't matter if the groceries in the cart are perfectly situated, the same every time. That's not life. Life sometimes means the groceries can just be thrown in the cart in no particular order. Maybe even taking a different path through the grocery store, everyone needs a little adventure. One step at a time though...it gets easier with time.

If you have the chance to have Alejandro in your thoughts, I am sure he would appreciate it. I didn't get too many details, but he doesn't see his wife very often, and I am sure it is a stress on the whole family. He would appreciate you keeping him in mind.

I Heart Google

And Google hearts me, #1 baby

However, I didn't give an update from the last free lunch, and the next one is right around the corner. On Cinco de Mayo. Maybe some sombreros are in order.

More soon.